I was holding Aiden tonight as he fell asleep (yet another no-nap day) and crying for a girl from my church. You see, she's having her baby right now, and she probably won't get to keep her for very long. Her baby has Trisomy 18, a condition that is incompatible with life. Meaning, a much shorter life expectancy.

I cried for her, her husband, and the baby. I cried for women who have had to give up their babies all around the world, for various reasons. I cried at the thought of having to give up my babies. I cried for the unfairness, that a person would be asked to give up something they treasured, something they longed for and prayed for, and received only to have it taken away so fast.

I know what the Bible says, about laying up treasure in heaven. But when we're faced with something so raw, so painful, as the knowledge that you may not get to whisper "I love you" to your living firstborn child, because she just died, it takes on a whole new meaning.

This baby is a treasure. A precious, living soul that will exist for all eternity. She is a creation of the Most High God, who knew of all the days of her existence from before time began.

She has weight.

She is loved.

Fun and muffins

My mom came for a visit this past week. It was great fun, and she did some amazing work in the boys' room. She got rid of a bunch of stuff that had just been hanging around cluttering it up, and she helped me organize their clothes so I could stay on top of it. She did in two days what would have taken me two weeks. Thanks Mom!

Things around here have regressed to me just trying to keep Parker from killing himself. (Part of why I can never get ahead on organizing... or cooking... or laundry... or dishes...) Apparently, instead of giving birth to a little boy, I had a monkey in disguise. He fell out of his high chair recently, off the window seat, almost off the table, and his current challenge is the kitchen counters. I took all the chairs out of the dining room, so now whenever we eat, we have to drag them in from behind the gate. My mom now refers to our house as "that gated community." His favorite word is "up" (no fooling) and he has absolutely no fear.

Great recipe for gluten-free banana muffins (Aiden's current favorite snack)

• ½ cup + 1 tablespoon sorghum flour
• ½ cup + 1 tablespoon potato starch
• ¼ cup + 2 tablespoon tapioca flour
• 3/4 cup sugar
• 1 teaspoon baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 cup butter, melted
• 1 1/2 cups mashed bananas
• 2 eggs
• 3/4 teaspoon vanilla

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Line muffin pan with liners.
2. In a bowl mix sorghum flour, potato starch, tapioca flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt.
3. Mix in butter, mashed bananas, eggs, and vanilla. Stir just until incorporated.
4. Spoon batter into muffin pan lined with paper liners.
5. Bake 25-28 minutes or until done.
6. Cool completely.

I got this off the internet and tried it one day, and have been making probably a batch every week or so ever since. Last week, I made them on Monday, and Monday night after everyone had gone to bed, Aiden got up and ate three more right outside my bedroom, bringing his total for that day to 7. I woke up and couldn't figure out why the banana smell was so strong, then my mom found the crumbs. Unbelievable, the amount of food a three-year-old can pack away.